THE LAST DANCE – Who dances after suicide?

 

By Brenda Bungei

 I have always fancied death. Even as a little girl even before I understood it. It is not as if I have understood it now. What I did not understand was why those we loved are the ones who would die. I have often thought of death as a way out, as the body’s way out simply because it cannot handle whatever one if facing.  As much as it seems like a way out it never considers the bearers of the tradgedy.It tears them down to helpless little souls

One thing about it  no one will tell you is that death is not just death, it depends on who’s dying and why are they dying .Suicide is the worst of them all. The grief does not just sit it gnaws at you until you are helpless. It eats you up to the last emptiness of your existence.

The kind of pain is intense and it hits very differently. This might be because of the struggle to get where they got and did not think they could go on. The sharp knife of a life lived shortly doesn’t just draw blood, it cuts deep clean and swift that at one point we think it’s the end. Hold a hand give hope for that is better than all things.

Suicide as the leading cause of death among teenagers and young adults. It has been associated with Mental Illness, which has become the talk over time. One problem with mental health is that it has been associated with weakness especially in the village. Stigma and introverted ness can steer one towards that direction. Once you cannot see the worth and beauty in yourself, it creates something darker within yourself that even prayers will not break.

They say prayer is a stronger weapon towards all evil (for those who believe), but then again what is prayer without the belief and faith. First, love yourself before you let others judge and critique you. One of the ways we can dance to the tunes of life every day without fear is by having a friend. One who can always listen without necessarily wanting to fix everything?

Parents are in anguish and their pain cannot be softened no matter how hard we try. It gets to a point where we will need to tame this crisis because it’s always those on the sidelines that dance to the pain of losing a dependable soul. How do you tell a mother, that her 20-year-old daughter didn’t want them to cry after being found because they wanted to end this hard life. They are always on the sidelines of these battles we fight, they may not understand whatever taking place but still talk to them, and they deserve at least that.

Most, if not half the population of the youth are depressed but can’t put it on the table because they fear being laughed at among other things. If today a survivor of suicide stands they often say they only wanted to kill the pain the hardships, it’s not as if they wanted to end their life. The question then comes, who dances after Suicide?

One thing we ought to understand is that we are never alone as long as we breathe. I have you and you have me. The troubles come and go hold on, a new phase will come. Hang in there.